The childhood Consequences.

The church I attend is having a fashion show for children under 12. While I enjoy watching glamourous women shay -shaying down the catwalk, I am saddened by young children over-dressed and over made up as it is hard to avoid going over the top. However, now I am a participant as my niece's grandfather has encouraged me to buy as well as sell some tickets. I might have still resisted as I have several charity events in need of money but for his explanation.

He is a pastor's son and he was not allowed to claim any prize he won at Church, His prize was promptly re-issued. Parents can sometimes try too hard to be fair or to avoid the appearance of favouritism..

My parents' behavior left no lasting impression on me but my brother is determined that his children would be rewarded just like everybody else. He wants his grand-daughter to win and if she has to sell the most tickets, he would help her achieve that. Obviously, it is too late for him but I wonder if her winning would put those childhood ghosts to rest.

It is difficult for parents to have the right balance in fostering self interests or altruism for each child. So they just have to hope that their children will respond to their values with compassion.

P.S The show was brilliantly choreographed and the children tastefully dressed. It was a friendly affair. My great niece won. I hope that it will be a cherished memory.

The warmth of friends

Rebecca and I chatted last night. She seemed next door but she was in Canada busily involved in finding routine after her month long absence. My home was the last visit, the end of her odyssey or missionary journey because she left me on Monday encouraged in the faith, uplifted in spirit with a song in my heart Probably,the three records she left contributed to my elevated mood but I felt myself soothed by her visit. We did reminisce about times and people past. We talked of people dead or those who have received life-changing news..Shielded by time and distance from the immediacy of grief is bittersweet. There is some incongruity in weeping for someone dead and buried a year ago.

Yet the pain of loss and sorrow over the hurts of friends remain and closure is not easily obtained.

Fortunately, we also had fun, in shopping and eating, common past times to cheer the soul. In addition, we talked abut men and their ways. God did have a sense of humor when he created them. There might even be divine reason while there are so many more women than men in church. Still with Rebecca, the conversation was insightful and hilarious.

Stepping stones

Hi, I missed you . Each day you fill  my thoughts as I collect stories to share or ideas to explore but my blogtime, I’m exhausted talk to you  and  fall asleep bloated with too much thought , much of it erased  wit, their events merged so where  to begin.

 

The Conference is over but the pace did not decrease. I wanted to tell you about Liz Murray, a lady of poise and purpose. She passionately articulated  a message of hope which she infused guided her from homelessness to HARVARD.

Sitting  at a table, with complete strangers , I cried as she spoke  as I inwardly gave thanks for all the opportunities I  enjoy.   I was even more inspired when she wrote that I should grasp my dreams.  Those dreams involve writing  and yet despite my best intentions, weeks fly  faster than words do.

Today,  I reluctantly replaced  my phone as it  was broken.  I don’t do well with new technology  so I am relieved that I have some free time to get to grips with it.

Although nothing could dampen my sense of thankfulness as this weekend  provided so many extra opportunities of God’s love and attention to the details of my life.

MY former friend and I  spent Thursday evening  without innuendos or referral to our failed relationship as he  carefully  completed  my half finished table someone started three years ago. It helped hat I consider him a good  person who could not love me as I needed.   Nonetheless,  it was great news to hear that two friends  are  hoping to end their separation. Paradoxically, being apart can  renew one’ s feelings and love

The weekend  also brought calls from friends cementing decades of friendships they gave my self  esteem a boost.

Legacies

On Saturday, Lara and I went to see “Rent”. It was an animated performance punctuated by moments of passion and pathos. The play celebrated a group of impoverished young artists whose views on life and society welded them together in friendship as they suffered for their art. Despite their poverty, the warmth of their relationship resonated in my spirit and I was deeply moved when Roger, one of the main characters, became frustrated as he desperately searched for the one hit song. The desire to leave a legacy seems to be part of the human DNA.

Although, I’m no longer engulfed by the desire to have children, Roger’s refrain echoed in my heart. Biological legacies are the most natural and gratifying. Those unable to achieve them have the challenge of finding other ways.

It is tempting to think of grand projects and ignore the casual opportunities life offers to make a difference. A well-chosen word, a well-timed hug, all enrich our lives far beyond what the giver could ever have anticipated. Since moving to WV, the legacy of friendship has blessed my life. As for my legacy, I greet each day as an opportunity and try to love somebody. Hopefully, their load becomes a bit lighter and they feel cared by God.

Technological Transitions-my first blog

"Transitions" was  my first choice of  names  as it described as well as reflect  the story of my life.    Lara ,  God’s gift to me, patiently tried other names, like Grateful” but they were all taken.   I really wanted a  name that expressed something  about me and we were both relieved when “A Graceful Journey” was accepted.   

Sometimes,  second best could be perfect.   When I think of  God’s grace that has clothed my life in  many places and events,  my journey thus far has been indeed full of grace.  The name  now feels right because I am truly grateful for all the blessings I have enjoyed in the many and varied transitions of my life.

I say this with thankfulness even as I move  on from a relationship  that made me grow but could not bring forth fruit.   My sister’s practical support, my mentor’s solid advice,  Lara’s prayers  and the loving messages from friends around the world are  part of God’s grace in action  that has  enabled me  to remain  joyful.  

There are still some weeks of summer left.   I  love the heat, the  lure of the outdoors even when it means that I can go no further  than the distance from parking lot to office. I linger outside and smell the roses. I  make small talk to delay the moment of going in  to  be taunted by the cold  air that aches my bones.    Love  has not made me blind  to the needs of others. For some the heat of summer is unbearable but I wish  that church and  work were  warmer in my favorite season.